Thanksgiving 2005

I am thankful every day of my life, but today is a perfect day to list the many things I'm thankful for:

1. My most precious, sweet baby... Miss C, and all the love she gives me.
2. My home.
3. My garden.
4. All the people I love.
5. That I have so many good friends.
6. That I have a job.
7. That I work with people I love and consider good friends.
8. That I'm able to meet my bills, and put a tiny bit back into savings.
9. My extra-curricular jobs, for reason number 8.
10. That I have learned the lessons that I have.
11. That I had the best parents in the world. That I know they're still watching over me. That I know they can hear me, I just can't hear them... but that I KNOW what they would say.
12. That I have lost the worst and most that I can lose... knowing that I can lose a tremendous amount again, but with the experience to know I can survive.
13. That I know what I'm looking for in an intimate relationship.
14. My good health.
15. For my little CRV, which will soon be back in good shape.
16. That I am blessed in ways I'm not fully aware.

Ok... I don't know why it hadn't occurred to me sooner, but the reality of the way the reality series has come into reality... I feel like all my favorite LB folks have been cheated out of their true emotions.

Who knew what Lauren and Stephen could mean to each other? Or to anyone else...

I'm sorry, but throw Paris Hilton into the picture (as well as many, many others)... and life is no longer real.

Take out their interests in surfing and cooking and romance... and you have just another group of celebrities without a grounded investment in life.

Color me stupid and naive... I thought the relationship between Lauren and Stephen might mean more than that.

Talan... Engaged?

Excuse me? Talan is engaged to Kimberly Stewart???

Please! I beg you, Talan! Say it isn't so! No slight intended toward Kimberly Stewart... I'm a big fan of her dad's, and I have nothing in particular against her (well, excepting that statement she made about my gal, Jennifer Anniston!!!).

It all just seems way too superficial... and I feel ashamed of my gullability. I believed Talan to be chivalrous and genuine... but the article concludes by stating that he's attempting to start a career in music. Well, doesn't that explain a lot?!

Ozark Mountain Resort: Day Two

Miss C and I hiked short distances today, trying to acclimate ourselves to (1) hiking, (2) steep slopes, (3) leashes and (4) relieving on command.

Number (2) was a challenge... but (4) was particularly problematic. I don't ever remember a time when I've been so consumed by whether she has pooped or not. For two reasons, I just want to know that she has: (1) She'll be more comfortable... and (2) I'll know when I go to bed at night... that she won't get an uncontrollable urge at 2am. Color me selfish for wanting sleep... or color me scared of the sounds of the deep, dark wildness... but I want to know by 9pm, that we are in for the evening.

I drove in to Kimberling City to the grocery store this afternoon. I didn't know which one I was going to, until I pulled in the parking lot.

I passed up "Summer Fresh"... mostly because we are in the heart of the fall. Second, because of a funny little saying that popped in my head... "summer fresh, summer not".

So... I went to "Harter House". Yes, that is "Harter", no "C".

According to what I read on the billboards, as well as the resort propaganda... "Harter House" is known for their meats.

Let me translate that for you... that means that they package it for you when you order it. They don't have ready-made packages sitting in cases. I'll add... the meats were extremely fresh, good and plentiful. The rest of the store's contents... not so much so.

It was good to get out of the cabin, though... alone. I am having to acclimate, too, to constant companionship. I'm not saying that it's not pleasurable... but, I'm not accustomed to someone asking... when I prepare a drink for myself... "are you thirsty?"... or a snack, "are you hungry?"...

All's good. It remains to be seen, however, if this week of vacation seems short... or long.

Ozark Mountain Resort: Day One

Well... we're here.

The day was pleasant but long.

The turning leaves were just beautiful. I'm sorry that I couldn't really take it all in, but the roads (by this point in the journey) were trecherous for a driver who is only accustomed to the flatlands and traffic jams of Houston. I wish we could have taken photos... it WAS breath taking.

The cabin is great, but in the dark... I'm disappointed with the resort. First, the roads within the resort disappear below the hood of the car. They are also not well marked. Second, the slopes are so steep, that I can only envision my 71 year old aunt trapped within the confines of the cabin. It scared the wits out of me, watching her navigate her way in...

There are guardrails, but no handrail. There are steps, but they slope and are unevenly spaced. This is no place for an elder or anyone with who has any sort of mobility difficulty... or for that matter, anyone who is the least bit out of shape!

I called the resort office, though, and they are willing to move us tomorrow, if an accessible unit is available. My aunt and I have agreed to take a look at the situation in the morning's light.

For now... we will make it an early night. We are without supper (except for Miss C, of course!)... and tired!

Ozark Mountain Resort: Our Departure

I've got the CRV cleaned up and loaded and Miss C and I are heading out this afternoon. Our first stop will be Nacogdoches, where we will stay overnight at my aunt's and uncle's house. My aunt will join me on this adventure.

I should tell you that my aunt and uncle have graciously offered their time share to me, either by gift or by will. They have reached a point in their lives, where they no longer wish to travel regularly. They have a red zone timeshare, with unlimited use. Their "home" property is in Kimberling City, Missouri, and that's where we're headed.

Who better to share our week with, than my aunt?! She loves Miss C, and she loves me a little bit, too. We've had a lot of fun planning and I'm excited that the time has finally arrived.

UPDATE: I have made it to Nacogdoches. We only had to stop once for someone to relieve herself. I'm not naming names, but it wasn't me. After a brief walk in Livingston, we were back on the road, and we made it here without incident.

Random Memo 103005: Making Up For Lost Time

A lot has happened since I last blogged. And I've been busier than busy. If idle hands are the devil's playground, then I'm in good shape!

1. The Astros won the National League title. I'll admit it... I was in bed when the title was clinched, but I got up and dressed and went out to the street where neighbors were gathering to celebrate (hugs, high fives and fireworks).
2. The World Series fell far short of my long-awaited expectations. And it didn't have anything to do with how the Astros played. I think our guys did an outstanding job, played hard and displayed the heart and good character I know they have. It was the media degradation and incessant criticism... of not only the team, but the City of Houston, in general. I grew from weary and saddened... to outright engraged. I remain proud of my Astros and their accomplishments, but I've developed a pretty powerful disrespect for Fox Sports and their commentary.
3. Some really good neighborhood relationships solidified during the preparation for Hurricane Rita. Good things DO sometimes arise from difficult situations.
4. I picked up a great moonlight project, and I'm stoked about the potential.
5. I had a great belated birthday celebration, put together by Dude and KBJ. It rocked.
6. Work has been WAY more stressful than usual. I've got a fast-track project, with a tight budget, and I've been working as hard as I can to meet all of the requirements. It's kinda neat because I'm working with a principal who is really involved, and he's helping A LOT. Too, the project is located close to my hometown, and I am childhood friends with the general contractor. I want to do an extraordinarily good job (like always), for all of the parties involved... which doesn't change my work habits, but adds a layer of internally initiated responsibility and stress.
7. Tragedy. An acquaintance of my aunt and uncle... hit an 18-wheeler head-on. He was killed instantly, as was one of his dogs. The other dog was at home. Long story short (link provided later), the man's father took the surviving dog to the pound. My aunt and uncle rescued him from the pound and have placed him in a private kennel, while we can find him a permanent home. Look for more links later, while I agonize over whether Miss C would accept him!
8. I'm getting ready to go on a road-trip vacation. The timing is poor on all accounts, but there are extenuating circumstances. Miss C and I are swinging through Doches and picking up my aunt. It will be a week of relaxation, games and jigsaw puzzles, hanging out, old movies, good food, long walks and a little antique shopping. Check out my blog from the road!
9. Went to a club last night to witness, for the first time, (my pal) Mike's band. Check out 2nd Wind. I rode over with (my pal and) Mike's wife. We had a great time and the band rocked the house! I can't wait to see/hear them again!!!

Cooking Chili for Boss' Day

Long story, but I find myself, as do several of my co-workers, cooking chili for a Boss' Day celebration tomorrow. And while it's not a competition... it really IS!

I've never cooked chili before, so for this endeavor, I interviewed many who have... and I researched the history of the delicacy.

I won't share my secret recipe at this point, as it is a little of everything I've learned, but I WILL reveal my recipe's name:

"East Texas Rib Sticker"!

It's tasting pretty dad-gum good. I think I might just have it in the bag... And, on the off chance it doesn't go over well, I'll have good eats for the weekend!

Change of Pace

The thing about my job that's so disjointing is... you run at 1000mph for so long, and then you stop for a day to travel and meet with a client. And that day is often (like today) comprised of a long car ride, waiting for parties to arrive, lengthy conversations, and not so many decisons before a leisurely, late lunch and car trip home.

It's like blasting off at full throttle and coasting to a stop. And tomorrow, somehow, I must find the fuel to blast off again.

Random Memo 100905

1. Met with new clients. They seem like great people. Our personalities gelled, and I don't think I've ever laughed so hard in my life.
2. Completed a drawing for MMSP.
3. Wrote a proposal for professional services.
4. Pulled some OT.
5. Shmuggled with Miss C.
6. Bleached the kitchen counters.
7. Washed and dried clothes and sheets and towels.
8. Made a vacation list and terms of agreement for my vacation companion. Ha.
9. Gathered pecans.
10. Piddled in the yard.
11. Watched a healthy share of television, including old movies and a ton of Made.
12. Enjoyed the Astros' results!
13. Checked out some other blogs.
14. Cleaned house.
15. Made lists and plans.

Good News, and Sad, Sad News

Good: Andy Pettitte leads the Astros to a win in Game 1 over Atlanta.

Sad, sad, sad: The body of Taylor Behl was found today, confirming everyone's fears.

Hurricane Rita: Journal Entries of a Hurricane Rookie

19 September - 25 September

You do what you can do to prepare, and then you journal for prosperity.

Luck was on my side this time, though. As I made preparations to leave, traffic was at a stand-still, in a universal effort to evacuate the city. In the end, I chose not to risk Miss C's life in the heat and traffic, as it might take 30+ hours in an un-air conditioined card to reach our place of escape, and to brace ourselves for the storm. And I was not alone. My neighbors were phenomenal.

And as it turned out, my destination... Nacogdoches... received far worse damage than did my neighborhood.

Check out my hurricane journal. I intend to keep it updated with survival and preparedness information, as well as to-do and stock lists.

Hilarious Question of the Day

Care to guess how old I am today?

If you think the question is funny, read the first comment!

46 Hopes

1. Dogs go to Heaven.
2. There's a big family reunion in Heaven.
3. Good health and a long life.
4. Miss C lives as long as I do.
5. Continued blessings.
6. Eternal forgiveness.
7. My brother has a change of heart.
8. Mom and Daddy are still looking over me.
9. That I'll always make them proud.
10. Houston and the entire nation are free from terrorism and natural disaster.
11. Someday we'll all get along.
12. I'll adopt, either formally or informally.
13. MJ will have a change of heart.
14. Or I will find the right S/O.
15. All the people I love will live in close proximity.
16. Pay house off at least 10 years early.
17. Total, unconditional equality.
18. Total, unconditional love.
19. God wraps His arms around my loved ones who have entered His Kingdom.
20. Lose weight and get in shape... to stay.
21. Spend more time with friends.
22. Prosperity and well-being for all my loved ones.
23. Pets and children never suffer from the neglect, abuse or poor decisions of others.
24. A more joyful way to earn a living.
25. Windfalls come my way.
26. Investments and savings increase.
27. Own land in the country, as well as a beach house.
28. Own a "sweet" Honda Trail 90.
29. To be valued and appreciated more, by others.
30. I'll know when opportunity knocks.
31. I'll publish my books.
32. An increase in everyday energy.
33. Better vision.
34. Professional advancement.
35. White bread will be discovered to cure cancer, heart disease and strokes.
36. Compete, athletically, again.
37. Security (emotional, financial and personal safety) and much, much less worry.
38. Many more hellos and no more goodbyes.
39. My voice is heard, and I'm careful when I use it.
40. Natalee Holloway is found alive in Paulus Van Der Sloot's house.
41. Reunion with those with whom I'm estranged.
42. Increasing strength and strong will.
43. Never have another accident.
44. Those I've lost know how much I love and miss them.
45. I'll not always be the one... who if something bad is going to happen to, it will happen to me.
46. Rats, snakes, poisonous spiders reach extinction. Mice exist only in laboratories.

46 Things I Don't Like Very Much

1. telephone
2. interruptions
3. helplessness
4. being sucked in by bpd's. (my beef is not with them, but with myself)
5. prejudice, bigotry and inequality
6. people who fear the unknown... cultures, ethnicities, orientations
7. patronization
8. lack of respect for military
9. lack of gratitude for what this country has to offer
10. stinginess
11. lack of empathy
12. weakness
13. narcissism
14. property taxes I pay for benefits I don't receive
15. income taxes I pay for things I don't agree with
16. the rising cost of living v. the stagnant (but stable!) paycheck
17. corruption
18. when the people you love more than anything... don't remember
19. constant pressure
20. the one time in a thousand that I don't read the signals correctly
21. people who don't feel guilt
22. bs
23. "Holier than Thou" crap.
24. inferiority
25. terrorism
26. close mindedness
27. cliques
28. hell threats and accusations
29. being ignored
30. bothering people
31. jealousy, when there is absolutely no reason
32. not doing a good job
33. errors, mistakes, bobos, misdemeanors... (even though we all make them)
34. people who don't admit mistakes
35. balancing time between billable, actual, and the budget
36. having a high billable wage and a low fee, which means having MANY less hours to work with! i would do ANYthing to increase profits, as i realize i work with great guys who share... but sometimes it's SO hard and i hold my feet to the fire.
37. winters that aren't cold enough
38. unpredictability
39. security concerns
40. lawn services that mow when the grass hasn't grown
41. ski trips without snow
42. not being heard
43. risking vulnerability and receiving no response... none
44. the other shoe dropping
45. demeaning response to honor, character and morality
46. excrutiating traffic

46 Tasty Delicacies

1. Veauve Cliquot
2. Pepi Sauvignon Blanc
3. DDFL's breads, et al
4. Patrick's flan
5. Dude's peas and mashed potatos
6. Dude's beef and mac casserole
7. KBJ's king ranch casserole
8. YMSP's tuna
9. MRT's chili
10. Sonic's cherry limeade
11. Hooter's wings
12. Wings n More (n Things) wings and beer
13. Tecate and lime
14. Chang's spicy chicken
15. Dude's filet mignon
16. KBJ's rocky road pie
17. DDFL's fried chicken recipe
18. RPG's chicken fried steak
19. Dude's corn log.
20. Cookie Bouquet's cookies
21. Anything at KL&W's.
22. Daddy O's Fifth Avenue Pizza
23. Margaritas
24. BarBQ Inn's fried shrimp
25. Flying Saucer Pie Company pies
26. Dessert Gallery's almost anything
27. Steph's Asian cole slaw
28. 59 Cafe's vanilla coke.
29. DDFL's corn casserole
30. Benj's fried turkey and anything else.
31. Pappasito's chicken fajitas.
32. Chang's lettuce wraps.
33. Marie Callender's key lime pie.
34. Pasta Lomante's shrimp scampi
35. Pasta Lomante's garlic cheese bread
36. Bellaire BroilerBurger burger
37. Myti Burger's you name it
38. Flying Dutchman's anything
39. Luby's fried fish combo with mashed potatos and fresh green beans.
40. Qing Dynasty's general tso's chicken
41. In order, the BBQ House (Nacogdoches) , Tom's BBQ (College Station / Bryan) and Pappas BBQ (Houston) chopped pork sandwich.
42. Taste of Texas filet mignon
43. Taste of Texas salad and and bread with apple butter
44. Kim Son's pan fried chicken
45. Catfish and fixings at Catfish King and the little place in Appleby
46. Fresh yeast rolls made by darn near anybody

46 Off the Wall Things About Me

1. I have a vivid imagination and propensity to exaggerate for humor.
2. I hold myself much more accountable than anyone else.
3. I'm not afraid to pony up and admit error and say I'm sorry.
4. I make many mistakes, but repeat VERY few.
5. I'm a closet psychologist. No... really!
6. I prefer Miss C's company to almost everyone else's.
7. I have an almost infinite willingness to forgive, if asked.
8. My preference is to listen more than I speak, but if I speak, I expect to be heard.
9. I have a tendency to test people.
10. I've fallen in unconditional love four times in my life.
11. I love the taste of milk chocolate and popcorn, at the same time.
12. I read the book, The Introvert Advantage, for the first time last year. And I finally understand myself.
13. Recognition is far less important to me than gratitude.
14. I've survived and overcome the worst things in life that are required. If I have no other consolation, it is that those things are behind me.
15. I pretended to be someone I'm not until 1995, at which time I gave up and became exactly who I am.
16. I accommodate pretense with reality in a 15/85 percent relationship. I do this to make others more comfortable, but also allow them the opportunity to grow, stretch and accept.
17. I try to live my life as an example.
18. I only have six regrets. I know what they are, and I don't have the guts to put them in public writing. I will say that I wish that I had cared for and loved beyond reason and situation, and that my timing had been much better . It's enough that I agonize over them regularly; I won't say more.
19. In spite of my rolling eyes in childhood, manners, ettiquette and life rules are very important.
20. My Daddy introduced me to two people, that in retrospect, tells me that he understood me far deeper than I understood myself. Further, he loved and respected me more than I love(d)and respect(ed) myself.
21. Of all the modern inventions, I like the telephone the least.
22. I always thought I would be "famous" among my peers.
23. I once had a dog who was JUST like me, very intuitive, and introverted. He gave me just what I needed, and I hope I did the same for him. He lived 17 1/2 years. We went through the highlights and lowlights of life together. I almost died when he did.
24. Miss C saved my life. And she changed it, too.
25. I connect easily.
26. I would make a wonderful mother.
27. I AM my Daddy and Mother combined.
28. I don't have a political party.
29. I find Frank Lloyd Wright to be equal parts genious and ass. For those reasons, I find him particularly endearing.
30. Up until 1992, I thought I could "fix" anything by hard work and prayer.
31. Up until 1999, I blamed myself for everything that went wrong in my world.
32. Up until January 2, 2005, I believed that I was less in the eyes of the Lord.
33. I could "fix" the world, if given the power and opportunity.
34. I feel for my friends as if they were myself.
35. My comfort, security and authentic self grow closer and closer with every passing day. (Refer to 16 above, and the shrinking 15/85 rule).
36. I am Virgo and Libra combined, (I was born Virgo, but premature by a month, thus intended a Libra).
37. I have distinct memories back to before pre-kindergarten.
38. I, once, re-arranged gifts from Santa under the Christmas tree, so that I received the things that I wanted.
39. I always took a bath, albeit a short one, when told.
40. I find Gertrude Stein, and her writings, personally inspiring and directly applicable.
41. I am kin to the Wright Brothers.
42. My relatives founded Moorhead City, North Carolina.
43. I'm a rule follower, to the extreme. When annoyed and provoked, however, I will tilt the scales to attempt to prove indescrepancies. (But I'll feel overwhelming guilt).
44. If I could change anything in life, I'd change certain people's hearts.
45. I used to view poverty as a disadvantage, but now I feel it's a badge of honor, courage and invention.
46. My pessimism is concealed optismism. I would much rather be pleasantly surprised, than bitterly disappointed.

46 Other Things I Love

1. Old fashioned hand written letters.
2. Spending time with Miss C.
3. Being told "I love you" by someone who really does.
4. Soft clean sheets.
5. Puppy kisses, and of course, breath.
6. Capturing the right person's attention and interest.
7. Gardening.
8. Jigsaw puzzles.
9. Throwing a successful party.
10. Comets games.
11. Bird watching.
12. Petting zoos.
13. Basketball.
14. Having friends remember.
15. Organization.
16. EBay.
17. New clothes.
18. Home improvement stores.
19. Common courtesy.
20. Handmade crafts.
21. Chicago.
22. Good company.
23. Fairness and equality.
24. Decorating for Christmas.
25. Buying gifts.
26. Ellen.
27. Figuring people out.
28. Playstation 2.
29. NTN trivia.
30. Sports bars, ice houses and brew pubs.
31. Design.
32. Vacation days.
33. Snagging a collectible at a good price.
34. Completing a project.
35. Crafting paper boxes.
36. Making jewelry.
37. Investments of ALL kinds, including time in friendships.
38. Friendliness of strangers.
39. Giddiness.
40. Finding an efficient solution to a difficult problem.
41. Comedy.
42. A good surprise!
43. Synchronized green lights.
44. Reality television.
45. Casual, spontaneous get-togethers.
46. Beach houses.

46 Treasures

1. Miss C, and everything about her
2. Family Connections
3. Friendships
4. Memories
5. My Wellington Box
6. Other treasure & memory boxes
7. Daddy’s worn silver coin
8. Mom’s embroidery
9. Home
10. Childhood Toybox
11. Photos, old and new
12. Mom’s manners, passed on
13. Daddy’s sense of humor, passed on
14. MaMa’s paintings
15. Cards, letters and notes
16. Jewelry given to me by my Daddy
17. My gavel and nameplate from my Senate days
18. Architectural License
19. Daddy’s many awards, plaques and trophies
20. My family’s pie safe, restored by my uncle
21. Book collections
22. Writings: books, research and journals
23. Mom’s utensils and cutting board
24. Daddy’s baby pillow & pillowcase
25. Architectural models
26. Frank Lloyd Wright collection
27. Patrick’s art & drift wood
28. Family quilts and afghans
29. Bob’s Tulia wheat
30. Diplomas and Awards
31. Gold Medal for Excellence in Architecture
32. Old scrapbooks
33. Adversities I’ve suffered, because they’ve made me stronger
34. Gana’s china
35. Daddy’s book, Daily Strength for Daily Needs, given to him by MaMa
36. Plants given to me by people I treasure
37. MaMa’s pallette and paint mixing knife
38. Gifts from MJ (will I ever get over it?)
39. Family antiques
40. Bob Holloway prints
41. MaMa’s glass collection
42. Professional drawings
43. Garden and trees
44. Daddy’s collections
45. Mom’s sewing box
46. Childhood phonograph

In Memory of Dan MacGilvray

September 13 is the birthday of one of my favorite professors, Dan MacGilvray.

Dan's specialty in the classroom was History of Design Technology. I took the class as an undergraduate, and served as his graduate teaching assistant for two years.

Dan and I shared an interest in and a love for architectural history and preservation. He took me under his wing, and guided me in my research efforts. He presented one of my works at a national symposium.

Dan had a quick and dry wit. He was fair and principled. He taught because he loved the subject. His enthusiasm was contagious.

He was one of the most important, of a hand full professors at Texas A&M, that really moulded me into who I am today.

He believed in me, and because of that, I learned to believe in myself. He was eloquent in his praise, but he was quick to follow with the comment, "Don't get a big head". I keep a post-it note with that phrase, written by him, just inches from where I sit right now. And it makes me feel close to him.

Dan passed away a few years ago, of a rather sudden and critical illness... pancreatic cancer.

Dan was many things to me. He was a little of a father figure in the way he guided and promoted me and just generally looked out after my best interests. He was a tremendous mentor, who took the time to encourage and challenge me, push me past my self doubting limitations, and then prove to me that I could far exceed the grandiose expectations that he had helped to define. He believed that I had what it took to accomplish everything... and more... that he had, which I found, unfathomable.

He did those things so well and nurtured my ego so much... that we eventually butted heads. And I am amazed, to this day, at his reaction. He did not put me in my rightful place, as mere student to the tenured professor. No. He acknowledged my defense and withdrew his stance.

As the days passed, having received my Masters Degree and left Texas A&M, Dan and I became friends, based on equal amounts of shared experience, love of subject and academia and personal respect.

He always called me when he was coming to Houston. The last time he called, we made tentative plans to meet for lunch. But he didn't call me that day. I assumed that his plans had changed. And indeed, they had.

A week or two after our planned lunch, another professor called to tell me that Dan had died. It happened so quickly, that he never had the opportunity to tell me that he was ill.

On shakey ground in most every aspect of my life when I walked into his class the first time, Dan eventually recognized, stabilized and then elevated me. I was noone special... just some kid in his class. If anthing set our relationship apart, it was my enthusiasm for the subject matter, as well as my desire and persistance to excell, because Dan was always Dan. He made himself available to all who were interested and always gave in equal measure to what was sought from him. (More later... on the term project that linked us).

I count Dan's death as a personal loss, and I will never forget him. And I find, as time passes... bittersweet joy in my memories. I am a different person for having known him... and I have no doubt that I would be in a different place, if he was still here to encourage and challenge me.